Fix it, I'm broken; the Aging process.

I want a new body. Not a "I want to trade my body in for a younger, better looking version" type of wanting a new body. Rather a "I'm sick, I'm tired, I'm falling apart and broken" wanting a new body.

Recently, I just turned 29 and as most of my friends know, that was quite difficult for me. Even sadder was that the day passed with little fan-fare. No special trips, not big to-do's. In some ways, that's good. I mean, I turned 29, not 9, right? And it's not the "big" 3-0 after all. Unfortunately, when my birthday rolls around next year, I will most likely a)not be in Seattle anymore and have just moved to another new location and b)could possibly be pregnant, which puts a real damper on festivities (no alcohol to help drown my sorrows over turning 30. Shut up Sami).

Now, how does my age (as young as I am in respect to things) play into my body needing to be replaced? Well.. I'm 29. And yet, my knees crack and often swell with no explanation, throb and are generally a pain (figuratively and literally). Bursitis of the knees along with Patella Femoral Pain Syndrome will do that. No to mention that after having Stress Fractures in BOTH my legs (Bilateral, Medial Tibial Plateau and the Distal Shaft), one leg seems to have residual issues. Mainly, arthritic ones. The leg hurts when it rains, it hurts when the barometric pressure changes, it hurts when I tap it slightly and not even enough to leave a bruise. It just hurts. All the time. THIS ISN'T TYPICAL FOR A 29 YEAR OLD!! Unless, of course, you were a super athlete as a child and teen; say an Olympic Gymnast who won a Gold Medal in 1996 at the age of 16. Then is would make sense.

And my legs are only the start of if. I've suffered from lower back pain for over 15, pushing 20 years now. How is that normal? And let's not even go to the whole "I slept funny and now I have a funny pain in my shoulder" issue. Or all the girly-part issues.

I would just like to either become the Bionic Woman, or trade my body in for a new one. Anytime now, thanks!